Thursday 21 June 2012

Look Closer - See Me

I read this for the first time this morning and wanted to share it with you, although I'm sure many of you will know it already.


What do you see, people, what do you see?
What are you thinking, when you look at me
A crabby old woman, not very wise.
Uncertain of habit, with far-away eyes,
Who dribbles her food and makes no reply.
When you say in a loud voice "I do wish you'd try!

 Who seems not to notice the things that you do.
And forever is losing a stocking or shoe.
Who, unresisting or not; lets you do as you will.
With bathing and feeding, the long day to fill.
Is that what you're thinking, is that what you see?
Then open your eyes, you're not looking at me.

I'll tell you who I am as I sit here so still!
As I rise at your bidding, as I eat at your will.
I'm a small child of 10 with a father and mother,
Brothers and sisters, who loved one another.
A young girl of 16 with wings on her feet,
Dreaming that soon now a lover she'll meet.
A bride soon at 20 – my heart gives a leap,
Remembering the vows that I promised to keep.

At 25 now I have young of my own
Who need me to build a secure happy home.
A woman of 30, my young now grow fast,
Bound to each other with ties that should last.
At 40, my young sons have grown and are gone,
But my man's beside me to see I don't mourn.
At 50 once more babies play around my knee,
Again we know children, my loved one and me.

Dark days are upon me, my husband is dead,
I look at the future, I shudder with dread.
For my young are all rearing young of their own.
And I think of the years and the love that I've known.
I'm an old woman now and nature is cruel,
'Tis her jest to make old age look like a fool.
The body is crumbled, grace and vigour depart,
There is now a stone where I once had a heart.

But inside this old carcass, a young girl still dwells,
And now and again my battered heart swells.
I remember the joy, I remember the pain,
And I'm loving and living life over again.
I think of the years all too few – gone too fast,
And accept the stark fact that nothing can last.
So open your eyes, people, open and see,
Not a crabby old woman, LOOK CLOSER, SEE ME.

I'll admit that I cried when I read it - I found it really moving.  From what I've read, this poem was found among the possessions of an old lady who died in a Scottish hospital.  I have no idea who wrote it, but tell me if you know.
Love, Liz

24 comments:

Anonymous said...

Nobody seems to know who wrote this, if you Google it, you will get several references and it's listed as ANONYMOUS. Whoever it was had great insight let me tell you! I can see me in it, and feel sure lots of other ladies will too, those who have a bus pass and a darned sight more life behind than ahead. Which is a depressing thought at times, if you let it be. Trick is, don't let it!
Thanks for sharing, it's beautiful, in a heart-rending way.
Maggie at a quietlifeforme.blogspot.co.uk
abookloversplace.blogspot.co.uk

Miss Simmonds Says said...

That's so terribly sad!

June said...

I've read the poem before as someone who worked in a nursing home showed it to me. It is as you say a tear jerker. I can't help with who wrote it, I'm afraid!
June

thriftwood said...

That is so beautiful and sadly so true, people just see what they see, and don't know the person inside, her life, her hopes and dreams ... sadly it may happen to us too ... I love the advert on the tv where the woman used to run everywhere, but didn't have the opportunity to take it further, and now is running through her daughter who is in the Olympics. You've really made me think with this poem ... have a lovely day, Claire xxx

Anonymous said...

Such a wonderful poem, Liz. Don't know who wrote this but it's so true.
Thank you for sharing !!

Vintage Jane said...

Feeling pretty emotional at the mo and now you've set me off again!! So true, so sad. Everyone should read it, sadly the elderly are so often taken for granted or worse still, forgotten. M x

Anonymous said...

very poignant words, thank you for sharing.
Thea x

Unknown said...

ok..started my day off with a few tears but all good. these are "words to remember" because, God willing, one day we will ALL be that old! TFS!

Paulette said...

These words will change how I look at people, all people, thank you for sharing.

Attila said...

I don't know who wrote it but something similar hangs on the wall of the nursing home where my mum lives. I just saw the fabulous play "Lost for words" by Deric Longden. Pete Postlethwaite played Deric and Thora Hird (superbly) as his mum, who had a stroke and got her words very muddled. I read the book and all his others which are poignant, funny, tear-inducing and very beautiful. In one scene, mum was in hospital and two young nurses chatted over her about their own affairs as if she weren't there. Deric brought in a photo of her as a young woman and they said; "Is that her daughter?" Deric said, "no that's mum when she was young." At that the nurses started to talk TO her, not OVER her. Very good illustration of the poem's point.

Mrs. H said...

It made me cry too
x

Ann@A Sentimental Life said...

reminds me of a poem my Great Grandfather wrote at 91, about being old and when his pipe will soon be laid down.

blackenpot said...

Beautiful, and says a lot of things! I worked at a nursing home for 17 years and had many good conversations with the elderly. As I get older I hope that people around med will also se the young lady inside.

Thank you for sharing.

Missy said...

Very moving.
x

Deborah said...

Lovely poem, thanks for sharing :)

Bee happy x
Have a delicious day!

vintage grey said...

Thanks for sharing this poem Liz. Beautiful. xo Heather

bellaboo said...

Everyone who works with the elderly should be given this poem to read.I have read a similar one,but the writer was a man. Very moving. :0)

Annie said...

This is a wonderful poem, it was made in to a short film featuring Virginia McKenna . I have used it in the past in staff training ,particularly for people working with dementia patients. You can see an extract here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MTcopj6dYWQ
Ann x

mrs cheese said...

Thank you for sharing this poignant piece of poetry.
How very sad and moving
xx

Maria said...

LIZ,
This is all so true...
Every thing seems to be geared at our young these days!
And I don't think we have had it nearly as tough as our older generations....
Made me think and also made me weep...
Thanks for sharing..
Mariax

sky-blu-pink said...

So beautiful. I too was moved by Lost for Words when I saw it some years ago. I heard today that a good family friend and my sister's Godfather died, which although he had been ill for a while and was well into his 80s, made me very sad, and that too brought it home that no-one lives for ever. Carpe Diem!

Used-to-Bees said...

Tears came to my eyes before I was on the third verse...So poignant - thanks for posting it as I hadn't read it before.
x

The homesteadingcottage said...

I've never heard that poem before, but it was quite sad. I had the blessing of caring for my Grandmother after her stroke (she also had severe dementia). She was my heart and best friend. I find it hard to understand people who don't see our elderly wise ones as anything but jewels. They may not sparkle like they used to and some may be cranky and crabby, but if you've reached beyond the age of 80, you've earned the right to be cranky (: I think people have lost the art of looking at the soul of those around us...instead they see the surface. The surface can be deceiving. It doesn't show the past or our experience or the love we've shared. If we simply seek the heart of another, treasure can be found.

I just found your blog and became a follower (: Can't wait to come back for more posts...May you have a lovely weekend!!

Michele
xoxo

Julie Whitmore Pottery said...

this reminds me of my beautiful mother, who I used to come upon in her room, with a dreamy look on her face staring out at the garden and birds/ Thinking of her life.
It makes me miss her today, but thank you for posting this so very much
xx
julie